No matter how long I work in the construction industry, nearly 5 years now, I still have the sense of not knowing. No matter how many houses I am involved in building and renovating I still have the sense of not knowing. No matter how many tradespeople I employ, direct or instruct, I still have the sense of not knowing.
There is a certain lack of trust in my own abilities, that I have only recently come to realise is not due to not knowing, but due to a lack of trust in myself. Now it would be easy to speculate that this comes from the industry in which I choose to work, but in actual fact it comes from my life long lack of trust in me.
It’s not just work in which I have this feeling of inferiority; it’s in just about all aspects of my life. Parenting, the children, sport, even my own opinions!!
I have always felt that I didn’t, couldn’t or wouldn’t know enough. I cannot remember a time that I fully trusted my own abilities. Now that I have had this revelation, what am I going to do with the information?
I am going to learn to trust in myself. I am going to learn the trust others have in me. I have had so many business opportunities presented to myself in the last month or two, all of which involve my knowledge and experience. Previously I would shy away from such opportunities, but not now.
I’ve decided to back myself, and to learn how to trust my know knowledge, and my instincts. I do not need to understand tie downs and bracing to be good at my job, BUT I need to trust in the people I put in place and their knowledge, just as they need to trust in mine, as do our clients who are relying on me to ensure I always have the right people in place to produce the quality job they come to expect.
It is true that the construction industry is good at isolating women and their apparent lack of knowledge, but it can also be said, that with the right team in place the opposite is also true. The Builder and I have worked long and hard to ensure that we have surrounded ourselves with the right team, now I need to learn to trust myself and the things I do know, while being open to new opportunities to learn.
How do you push past your own feelings of doubt? What sort of team do you have surrounding you in your workplace?
Linking Up with Essentially Jess for #IBOT