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Finding Confidence – Women In Construction

Finding Confidence – Women In Construction

Working in the construction industry can be very challenging, and I have spoken on here a few times about how I have struggled with finding my worth and feeling inferior, but with some perspective and a few life lessons, I have managed to find my confidence again all while working in an industry that is typically not kind to women. Today I am sharing my tips, that will help everyone find confidence, especially when they need it most.

finding confidence

Finding Confidence, How I Find It While Working in The Construction Industry

Silence the Wolves

I’ve read many a self help book that spoke about stopping the negative voice inside your head, but how do you actually do that? All the times I first tried to do this ending in the relentless negative voice creeping back in, it was nearly impossible to silence the wolves that dragged me down. Then I read about another tip, I tried it and it truly works.

Submerge yourself in the moment, when you are truly submerged in the moment, paying attention to all that is happening around you in that moment, there is no space for those negative thoughts. This simple trick put an end to the wolves. My most difficult time to keep them at bay is in the silence in a drive to work, or on the way to school pick up, but when I put this skill into practice, and took time out to notice the colours of the cars going by, or what the car sounded like, sang the song on the radio, or noticed the wind in the trees, when I allow thoughts of what is going on around me to fill my head, I keep the negative ones away.

Give Yourself Some Credit

When was the last time you gave yourself a pat on the back, a high five, or said to self, job well done? Why not? Why don’t you congratulate yourself when something you have done is done well. I pat myself on the back for everything these days, I have become my own cheer squad. Woohoo I got the washing on, I rock, the dinner is on the table, how awesome, I got dressed today!

Start by giving yourself some credit for the small things, and very soon you will find you are able to give yourself credit for the bigger things. So much of what we do is amazing, remember when we were kids, and our greatest biggest achievement is learning to walk, or talk or eat solid food?!? Well why don’t we give ourselves a pat on the back for the smaller things each day. Such a positive way to look at ourselves.

Don’t Judge Others

This is such a big lesson, and surprisingly easy to follow. It is simple, don’t judge others and before long you wont even think about how others are judging you. I am going to be really honest here, at the risk of being slammed, I used to look at people and allow myself to put them in a box. She’s single, he’s a tradie, oops she’s a bit overweight. Although I am embarrassed to admit this is the way I thought, I actually think our society has conditioned us to think this way, and unless we know better, this is how we continue to think.

But do you know, that every time we step out, we are subconsciously thinking then about how others are judging us? The nature of the beast means that we are never seeing this as a positive. When you consciously stop judging others, your own subconscious gets a break!

How do you do it? The same way you silence the wolves, take note of the moment you are in, concentrate on only the good in what is around you. The trees are beautiful in the breeze, feel the air moving around you, sing your favourite song in your head, or out loud and proud.

Stop Comparing

You’ve heard it before, comparison is the joy thief, I want to tell you again how true this is! There will always be someone better off than you, with more money, better looks, more success, but you know nothing of the story behind that person and while you are busy comparing yourself to them or their journey, you are missing out on the happiness your own life is granting you.

Be Grateful

Bringing gratitude to you life is a beautiful way to build confidence. When you take time to notice all that the universe has provided you, life is a far more beautiful place to be. I practice this by keeping a gratitude journal, and each day I take the time to write 3 things I am grateful for. In the beginning it was the big things, breathing, a home, food, and very quickly it became the hundreds of little things we have each day that get forgotten. The sound of my child’s breath, the rustle of the leaves in the trees, the butterfly that danced by.

When you are living a life of gratitude, the bubble you live in is a shiny, happy place to be. Please try it, get your kids involved, the lessons for them and the gift of giving this lesson will impact all your lives in countless ways.

A different style of post from me today. I hope that some or all of this resonated with you. Confidence is the most attractive part of a person, and gives us the ability to live a truly fulfilled life.

I would love to hear how you find confidence, how do you slay your wolves?

Nicole xxx

Linking up with Essentially Jess for #IBOT

 

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18 Comments

  1. Submerging yourself in the moment is what works for me. I just have to mentally shut the door on everything else and get on with it.

    1. Not the easiest in the beginning, but with practice it works so well! x

  2. I found it took ages to recognise when I was thinking badly, and after that it was easier to catch and fix it.

    1. It sneaks up on you in the beginning. Glad you’re finding it easier to catch now x

  3. Great advice, Nicole. Confidence is not my strong point. I like your idea about silencing the wolves. I never really thought about that before xx

    1. I believe confidence is something we are all born with, it’s only after society gets its hands on us, that we begin to question ourselves. If only there was a way to stop that happening. xx

  4. I love this post – I’m with you on gratitude and the judgy judgy, if only those wolves would be quiet and comparison would stop stealing my joy!

    1. It all comes with time and practice, I am sure you can make like Little Red Riding Hood, and show those wolves a thing or two!!

  5. Awesome tips Nicole. I especially love the idea of not judging. There’s so much wisdom in that.

    1. Thank you Jess, it took a lot of practice, but now it’s rarely something I need to think of, it just happens. xx

  6. Silence the wolves is a great analogy to beating negative thinking. That’s a great way of putting it. As for the not judging, I’m always working on this and surprisingly becoming a mother has helped me to judge less. That and possibly getting older and experiencing what life has to offer. 🙂

    1. I agree Bec, with both points, I think it has a lot to do with becoming a Mother and finding ourselves in positions we never considered we would get in to, and also the wisdom of age is a marvelous things, if only we could instill it into our children 🙂

  7. A different style post maybe, but still great words of wisdom Nicole. Self confidence always makes a person more attractive.

    1. Thank you for your kind words Annette! xx

  8. Some great advice here Nicole. I really hate the comparison thing and shut it down whenever my husband starts on. LIke you said, there are always going to be people who are “more than” or “less than” me but it really doesn’t matter. I just need to look after my side of the street. Also, podcasts in the car or while commuting make it hard to think about other things. With music your mind can wander but an interesting podcast will keep you engaged and the wolves at bay. Cheers, a

    1. Podcasts are the bomb! They help me out so many times, especially when doing paperwork! xx

  9. great tips Nicole!
    i especially love the idea of not judging. the theory silence of wolves also very impacted.

    1. Thank you for your kind words x

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